Cuddly Free And Single Review
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/VideoGame/SoftAndCuddly
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Cuddly Free And Single Review Tool
Soft & Cuddly is a video game developed by John Janes and published by The Power House for ZX Spectrum in 1987. It's a platformer remembered mostly by the Nightmare Fuel and Mind Screw with gory and weird imagery. In it, you control a small blue man named Dren who must rebuild his mother, who is the Android Queen, by finding eight pieces of her scattered around 256 screens. The game also came with a song by H.E.X. (who later went on to develop and provide the music and art to the rather infamous Top Banana), which can be listened to here.
Compare with an earlier released game Go To Hell by the same developer and Top Banana by the music composer, which despite being far Lighter and Softer, is still surreal and unsettling.
This game provides examples of:
- Atop a Mountain of Corpses: The box art shows a monster sitting on a bunch of decapitated heads.
- Deceptively Silly Title: Nope, not a kid's game, even if the title would suggest otherwise.
- Excuse Plot: Essentially all of the storytelling is contained within several sentences of scrolling text on the controls screen. Moreover, it eventually outright asks, 'Do you really believe this tripe?', further confirming it's not to be taken seriously.
- Gorn: Quite a few gory looking traps, and the title screen face is not much better.
- Jump Scare: The infamous title screen. It pops up after the game finishes loading, and it can certainly be a surprise.
- Last of His Kind: The text scroll beneath the controls screen states that Dren is the last of the race of Snigniv, and will stay that way unless he manages to restore the queen. However, the same text asks 'do you believe this tripe? Are you mad?' immediately after, so this may not actually be the case.
- Mind Screw: The game has some really weird stuff in it... skulls with berets, weird fish-like creatures, zombie sheep and the like.
- Never Trust a Title: This game is not soft and cuddly, at all.
- Nice Hat: Skulls wear berets in this game, for some reason.
- Spikes of Doom: One of the most normal things about the game. Nevertheless, they look even creepier than usual due to being taller than the protagonist and strikingly monochrome.
- A Winner Is You: Find all the items, and you get the ending which consists of a single line.'Good, whip me with a banana'.
- It is possible that this was meant to foreshadow Top Banana, the composer's next game.
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If you’re a customer of ours, you might’ve seen a pink, fluffy, eight-tentacled friend popping up on our social media. In case you haven’t, here’s one. We call them Constantine.
I’m Jess, Octopus Energy’s Chief Fluffy Octopus Wrangler. Our customers love our toy octopuses, so we wanted to give a little more insight into our eight-tentacled plushies – how they came about, and why we’re called Octopus in the first place. I mean, it’s a bit of an unusual name for an energy company, right?
Psst, If you’re one of our customers and would like a fluffy Constantine of your own, head to octopus.energy/givememyoctopus, put your details down and we'll send it out as soon as we can! If you’ve got one, we always love to see them on Instagram and Twitter – make sure to tag @octopus_energy!
We also give customers the option of a baby tree rather than an fluffy Octopus, and we're currently working with Hilderthorpe Allotment Society to plant them on your behalf, or as part of one of our various weird and wonderful tree planting projects around the UK (you can select this option in the fluffy octopus request form above). Read more about our work planting trees in schools and community spaces here, and our green work with Arsenal FC here!
Why do we call our plushy friend Constantine?
Our head of front-end development Ashley named our fluffy octopus Constantine. He was channelling the kind of octopus he hoped Constantine would be: a bringer of change like Constantine the Great, Emperor of Rome, and a clear, transparent communicator like John Constantine – Keanu Reeves' demon-channelling lead in the occult detective classic of the same name.
Or, he just liked the name. We wouldn’t want to read into it too much…
Why do we send them out to our customers?
The very first octopus toys were hand sewn by a small toy company in Wales. They were dotted around the office and so beloved by our team, and eagle-eyed customers that we decided to create some larger cuddly friends to keep them company! Our team quickly developed quite a soft-spot for our cuddly eight legged friends. You’ll find them all over the office now too, which can sometimes end up looking a bit like Octopolis - a real-life underwater octopus city!?
Luckily, our customers have been more than willing to take them off our hands – and as more than a million people have now switched to our 100% renewable energy, word has spread fast about our fluffy mascot. Since then, we’ve never looked back.
Where do they come from?
Our plushy friends started off as teeny tiny babies, handmade in Wales, but as our customer base grew and grew and grew, so did our Octopuses. They are now carefully (and ethically) crafted by a team of octopus-making experts in Dongguan, China, and we can send out both giant and teeny tiny Constantines.
Promo Sapiens: The Evolution of our Plush Constantine
First a fluffy fridge sticker, later a scruffy finger puppet, and finally perfectly cuddlable plushie we now know and love. Here's the evolutionary journey of the Constantine!
We have ensured the octopus-making process is ethical and 100% compliant with toy-making regulations. We’re also continuously looking into ways of carbon offsetting the octopus odyssey they undertake to reach our customers' front doors. From planting trees to investing in renewable fuel poverty solutions with the help of Renewable World. So, you can rest assured that your octopus has started life in the best way possible!
How many addresses have our octopuses been delivered to?
Since March 2019 we have sent 3,594 large octopus plushies and 8,140 of the teeny tiny ones. That’s a grand total of 11,734 finding their way to your homes… And counting!!!
Here are some funky facts about our eight-tentacled friends:
- There’s 289 species of octopus around the world (290 if you want to include Constantine!)
- They have eight arms, not legs and each arm has a mind of its own - literally...
- They have nine brains
- They have three hearts
- They have blue blood
- They don’t have any bones
- The standard plural in English of octopus is octopuses (according to the Oxford English Dictionary). The word ‘octopi’, which follows latin rules for plurals, is actually incorrect - who knew!? If you want to get really, really, technical – as the word ‘octopus’ is of greek origin, the plural should be octopodes.
Why are we called Octopus Energy?
Our loveable eight-tentacled friends are notoriously flexible. They can manipulate their bodies to assume a mind boggling array of shapes and squeeze through cracks and crevices of almost any size.
Octopuses are a great evolutionary success story, having adapted to a vast array of challenging environments over millions of years. This uncanny ability to adapt was one of the reasons our backers, Octopus Investments - the UK's largest investor in solar power, responsible for nearly 40% of the nation's large scale solar generation - chose the name Octopus.
Perhaps the only creatures on the planet more versatile than Octopuses are people. Our people are bound together by a company culture of personal accountability and autonomy. This, paired with building technology and an environment which embraces creativity, smarts and commitment, enables Octopus Energy to thrive in this age-old industry – championing long-term value, andsmarter, greener energy.
Whether it’s lowering carbon emissions to preserve the reefs they call home, or our World Octopus Day commitment to remove plastic from their habitat, having an ancient marine creature as a namesake helps remind us about why we do what we do. At the very core of Octopus’ Energy’s mission is a determination to push meaningful green change - to preserve our planet and all its inhabitants, however many legs they have.
Hey I'm Constantine, welcome to Octopus Energy!
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